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I dont know what i should do
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@ 15-12-2003 04:35 KrZeeKLutZ | 404 posts
|  Ok. here's the story. I have my boyfriend (lets call him Greg) that lives really far away and i really really love him and all and he loves me too. But there's this guy(let's call him brian) that lives here and he's in most of my classes and he flirts with me nonstop. i cant help it but to flirt back. Then someone asked me out for him and i said not now. But i'm thinkin i'm startin to like him a lot and i've been longing for affection like hugs n kisses. my boyfriend isnt able to do that and i just dont know what i should do! break off a really great relationship, for one that's completely unpredictable, cheat, or wait. I'm so confused and i definately don't want to cheat even tho my friends say he wouldnt know (it's be horrible and i'd feel so guilty!) so plz plz plz help me out with this one. thanx so much |
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 0  @ 15-12-2003 04:41 blondechika578 | 3,865 posts
| ok first dont cheat on him that will make things worse and he will find out they always find out just take some time and think if you really love this guy because if you really love him then you wouldnt start to like the guy that lives closer to you and you could tell the guy that lives close to you whats going on and but whatever you do dont cheat on him and dont just dump the other guy out of no where because that would make him very weired out for why you did that out of no where
by the way i hope that helped | | 0 @ 15-12-2003 05:01 SomeCallMeMaxx | 6,661 posts
| I was on the recieving end of this once. I was the long distance guy. I'll say this, the relationship ending with me doing this :
The guy will find out if you cheat on him, and good god I would hope that you'd feel too guilty to even consider cheating on him. That's just breaking someone's complete trust in you that you're faithful while he's not there. That's pretty rude and inconsiderate of someone else's feelings. But if that's the kidna person you are...I hate cheating.
If you want to be with the long distance guy I highly suggest not getting together with Brain, the local dude.. Even being friends. I know that's harsh but there's a good posibility that you might, one day, hook up with him and that'll p*ss off the long Greg, distance guy. Did I get the names right? I don't wanna confuse ya when I start ranting. As for flirting I think that's alright as long as you know where your heart is at. But you must realize that flirting, however innocent, has the chance to leading to something more.
Brian sounds like a cool guy, but that's just it. You don't sound like you know yet. But you know with Greg. Greg is willing to be with you without hugs and kisses. That's dedication you can't always find. Lots of my friends got dumped when their bfs left for college. Can you deal with that? I'm not trying to be sarcastic, it's a serious answer because some people can deal with it or even plan it.
Honestly, you can't find dedication like Greg has towards you. That's not something you can find every day in guys. On the other hand it might not be something you want right now. It might be that time for you to "test the waters" so to speak. Settling with a guy right now might not be the best idea, especially if you need that physical feeling.
Whatever anyone tells you, long distance does work. "Distance makes the heart grow fonder." Long distance works, people just lack the dedication and will power to do it. If you can't deal with not having someone physically all the time then don't do it. It's cruel to string someone along like that when you know you can't keep your end up.
Im my expereince, the girl dated a guy while she was with me. She called it a fling, just for that physical feeling of making out and hugging. Nothing sexual at all. I let her do it cuz I loved her. I did it even though I knew that he could eventually take her from me. I might've had her emotions but that's all I could have being so far away. The guy had her physically, and had the chance at taking her emotionally which he eventually did. She's still dating him 3 years later and I've learned my lesson. We're extrememly bitter towards each other, even after closure. Me at her for doing what she did to me because I felt dragged on and her at me for being so bitter towards her because she felt she didn't do any wrong, it just happened.
*ahem*
You probably have one shot at each guy, and it'd be best to chose now. Please, please don't choose both. That's not fair to either guy and this isn't a FOX reality show. Have you seen how those people cry? Not cool. If you do choose Greg then try to distance yourself from Brian, cuz he'll just confuse you and you might find youself in the same situation again.
Ya live once! Don't regret what you do, learn from it.
and good luck!  | | 0 @ 15-12-2003 05:06 SomeCallMeMaxx | 6,661 posts
| Oops, forgot this little part.
Need a personal opinion? Take Greg!!!! Screw Brain. You've already got something great. That's rare in todays world.  | | 0 @ 15-12-2003 05:20 KrZeeKLutZ | 404 posts
| Omg thanx so much. And i hate cheating too, i made a promise to myself i'd never do that. i cant even believe my friend said to do it! When i thought about cheating i had this great big feeling telling me it wasnt right, and it isnt. I couldnt do that to "greg" he'd be so crushed. and every chance he gets he calls me. i couldn't break his trust it'd be too awful. i'd never forgive myself if i cheated on him, cuz i could never find anyone like him. He's worth the long wait. and i gotta be stronger and just know that one day i will get the affection i want, but now's not the time. But soon.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SAVING ME FROM THE BIGGEST MISTAKE EVER!   | | 0 @ 15-12-2003 05:44 SomeCallMeMaxx | 6,661 posts
| The best feeling I've ever felt was looking at my gf's eyes for the first time, actually seeing her standing there at her door with a smile. Just for me. I had waited a yera for this. She was so beautiful and being with her made me nervous, happy, and actually gave me that warm feeling inside. Totally unexplainable. The wait made it so much better than any date I've ever had, including one-niters.
*swoons over memories*
I'm glad I could help, and good luck with Greg.  |
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