LetsSingIt the internet lyrics database
en
3

Why everyone in World War2 sucked (except Britain)

Follow 2
Share
Add topic
Search
Roxy_Ryan
0
Roxy_Ryan | 13-06-2006 21:59
I wasn't sure of which category to post this in, was kinda thinking along the lines of Politics but seeing as how this is more humorous then here it shall be stuck.

Basically, a friend of mine posted her view of WWII in her LJ, and I found it quite humorous... of course, everyone might not think along the same lines or even agree... but I don't really care.

In WWII, every country sucked except Britain. Honestly. They all sucked/were wusses/needed a kick in the pants. If you don't agree, I'll share with you my view of WWII, not necessarily in chronological order, with an abrupt start and finish. I call it:

WHY EVERYONE IN WWII SUCKED (EXCEPT BRITAIN)

ACT I
Germany: >>
Germany:
Germany: ::invades Poland::
Britain & France: Germany! We told you to stay out of there.
Germany: ...I changed my mind.
Britain & France: WE MADE AN AGREEMENT. IN MUNICH. WHAT ABOUT THE MUNICH AGREEMENT?
Germany: Yeah, about that. I had my fingers crossed.
Britain & France: F*** YOU.
War: Declar'd!

ACT II
Canada: Let's wait a week, and THEN declare war on Germany. That way we can assert our independence, and Britain will be proud of us. ::excited::
America: Yeah, you guys go ahead. We'll declare war ... next year. Yeah. We don't feel like it this year.
Canada: Don't want to get your feet wet, eh? Wuss.
America: Momma's boy.
Canada: WE ARE AN INDEPENDENT NATION.
Britain: F*** you guys. We're going to war.
Canada: WAIT. NO. DON'T LEAVE WITHOUT US.
America: Good luck. We'll see you ... next year.

ACT III
Germany: HERE WE COME, FRANCE. WE'RE TAKING OVER YOUR SMELLY COUNTRY.
France: OKAY. OKAY. WE'RE LEAVING. NO NEED TO GET VIOLENT.
Britain: France, WHY did I enter the war with you?
Canada: Look, Britain! Look! WE'RE not surrendering!
Britain: Yeah, Canada, that's ... that's great.
Canada: Hear that? Britain thinks we're great!
Britain: Don't you have a constitution to patriate already?
America: YOU GUYS ARE DOING A GREAT JOB. WE'RE WATCHING, AND IT LOOKS GREAT. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.
Allies: F*** YOU AMERICA.
France: YEAH. WUSSES.
Britain: SHUT UP, FRANCE.

ACT IV
Germany: HERE WE COME, BRITAIN. SURRENDER YOUR SOGGY LITTLE ISLAND.
Britain: NO.
Germany: Was?
Britain: EAT AIRFORCE, BITCHES.
The Blitz: BANG BANG FLASHING LIGHTS AND EXPLOSIONS
America & France: YOU'RE DOING GREAT, BRITAIN.
Canada: And Canada! We're in the RAF too.
Russia: GERMANY, WHY ARE YOU STARTING TO LOSE.
Germany: BECAUSE ... >> YOUR MOM.
Russia: WHAT IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
Germany: It means you suck and I want your stupid country. ::invades::
Russia: WHAT THE HELL, GERMANY. WHAT THE HELL.
Britain: Hahaha. Look who came crawling back to the Triple Entente.
Russia: I HATE YOU ALL.

ACT V
America: Okay - next year. We'll join the war next year, guys. Seriously, this time. We're just not ... feeling it right now.
Pearl Harbour: KABANG
America: ...
American Government: YES. AN EXCUSE. ::declares war::
America: ...Damn.
Americans: ENLIST'D!

ACT VI
D-Day: ::ensues::
Canada: WE'RE WINNING. WE'RE BEATING THE GERMANS. LOOK, BRITAIN. WATCH US KILL THESE NAZIS.
Britain: I'm a little busy right now, Canada.
Canada: WATCH US. YOU'RE NOT WATCHING. YOU'RE NOT WATCHING US.
Britain: Okay. Yeah, I saw. That was a great explosion, Canada. I saw it, and it was really good. YES, I'M SURE I WAS WATCHING.
Germany: WE'RE LOSING! HOW CAN THIS BE? GERMANY NEVER LOSES.
France: You lost in WWI.
Germany: SHUT UP.
France: Okay! ::sob::
Germany: ::'splodes::
Allies: HUZZAH.

ACT VII
Japan: C'MON, GUYS. LET'S KILL THOSE AMERICAN WUSSES.
America: SURRENDER OR RISK BEING TOTALLY DESTROYED.
Japan: HAHAHA! Yeah, we're pissing our pants now, America. DON'T TOTALLY DESTROY US. NOT THAT.
Hiroshima: KABANG
Japan: ...Raise your hand if you thought America was bluffing.
Nagasaki: KABANG
Japan: ::totally destroy'd!:: Okay! F***! Calm down. We surrender.
America: HUZZAH.

ACT IIX?
Russia & America: WE'RE SUPER POWERS!
Britain: ...How the hell did THAT happen?
Russia: >>
Russia:
Russia: ::sidles over to Cuba::
America: OH, F*** YOU, RUSSIA.

THE END.
1 to 25 of 37 comments
page 1 of 2
NightHobbit
0
NightHobbit | 13-06-2006 22:05
i loved it
LatinLockito
0
LatinLockito | 13-06-2006 22:15
hahahahah really good one!!!
Dagor
0
Dagor | 13-06-2006 22:20
one of the funniest things since a long time
DaDdY_DoLlaZ
0
DaDdY_DoLlaZ | 13-06-2006 22:22
haha.. yea i laughed the whole time i was reading it
sarah_2204
0
sarah_2204 | 13-06-2006 22:27
i definitely enjoyed that
(LSI bookmarks)
slim_gary
0
slim_gary | 13-06-2006 22:52
that is the funniest thing i have read in at least 6 weeks!!!!
fruity
0
fruity | 13-06-2006 23:17
haha that was really awesome. lol I loved Canada aw
xcr4zyx
0
xcr4zyx | 13-06-2006 23:27
isnt canada so sweeet i liked that haha
mounstrito
0
mounstrito | 14-06-2006 01:17
hahahaha what an incredibly smart friend you have!!!! really it is sooo good!
really really loved it!
Baby_Jenks
0
Baby_Jenks | 14-06-2006 02:24
Replace Canada with australia and it's still kinda the same story. All that's missing is

Australia : Hey england look at us we're good
England : Yeah that's nice old chaps. Say, how about you invade this nasty little beach that you've no hope of getting anywhere with, while we wait around the corner and eat scones and tea
Australia Sure thing boss.
lildrummergrl
0
lildrummergrl | 24-06-2006 06:43
hahahah!!!!! freakin hilarious!!!! niced one!!! u deserve a drink!
Ocean_Swirl
0
Ocean_Swirl | 24-06-2006 11:28
Awesome!! Just slightly offensve but fine!!
Barakine
0
Barakine | 24-06-2006 11:36
Haha, this was awesome.
Dropkicked
0
Dropkicked | 24-06-2006 13:46
yup lol, it is strangely accurate as well lol
AlmightyShmun
0
AlmightyShmun | 24-06-2006 14:05
Good stuff, except for a few little accuracy gripes. America didn't want to enter the war just yet because we weren't wholly sure of how to deal with the Depression, and the President was a pacifist.

Plus, Germany just barely lost WWI. And it was a conditional surrender, which Britain and France wholeheartedly exploited and screwed Germany over completely.
Rise
0
Rise | 29-06-2006 20:56
WW2 started at Versailles.
sexysugar15
0
sexysugar15 | 29-06-2006 21:03
HILARIOUSE


Lol..but canada isnt tht bad...i live here and its great!
vanhalengroupie
0
vanhalengroupie | 29-06-2006 21:17
i thought i would be offended by that but no, it was really funny!
(im from Canada)
mounstrito
0
mounstrito | 08-03-2007 13:36
Bump.
mounstrito
0
mounstrito | 08-03-2007 13:37
Bump.
dark_knight86
0
dark_knight86 | 09-03-2007 00:38
Ha, that was funny.
JuiceBoxJoe
0
JuiceBoxJoe | 09-03-2007 04:04
that was fantastic
PunkRckr8
0
PunkRckr8 | 09-03-2007 06:05
an entertaining little read. . .then again I was doing it with voices from 'The End of the World" flash movie, so that might have helped
TheAnnoyance
0
TheAnnoyance | 09-03-2007 17:41
great.
DarXide
0
DarXide | 10-03-2007 20:46
lolz! if only i was taught history this way, I wouldn't have hated the subject.
guest
guest
POP OUT SAVE saving ...
Read more: